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by : NOTpopular | written on :04/10/2012 | permalink

No cool, no friends

Friend or foe? Is there a difference?

I used to be known at school. Something they called like "Popular". before, I'm just an awful looser. but the hell i already got the guts to be those bullies that bullied me when i was fat! I knew it that it was wrong to be arrogant, boastful for my other classmates that are just like me back then when i was a LOSER. Some of them are my friends when i was just a fatgirl. But now i just get so mean to them :( Why am I like this? I know the feeling to be laughed at but I'm totally doing it to them. On the other side, my new COOL FRIENDS were just like those bullies that hurts me before. They're fun to be with. They're obviously cool and no one tries to quarrel to us. Everyone's seems to be afraid to have conflict with us. Yes, we laughed at losers, weirds, nerds and jerks. In our group, i used to be the most quiet one. So i'll get straight to the point. Although its fun to be with them i feel like the most UNLIKE at the group. i feel im being backstabbed with them. Even accused me of doing something i didnt do, is it just because they dont like me? For me to get off their company? Now i realized. COOL FRIENDS are cool, got really nice trippings, fun to be with but they're different from TRUE FRIENDS. When you got problems, they dont even care. Now i want to get back to my old friends. If i have to apologize i will for sure. But its just so hard. They seeing me being with the losers again instead of COOL KIDS. They're thinking im so awful. They pity me like "Ohw, why is she with the loser instead of those cools? Isnt she cool enough? Or she's just that bad for being cool HAHAH!"I dont even know where to put myself, for those i left or for those who left me? Now i dont have more friends. its a shame for those i bullied. Because i llook more awful than them. I feel like no one's with me. HELP ME :(

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