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by : Anonymous | written on :19/08/2011 | permalink

eraser sex

I went on the most awful date

I had been seeing this guy for about 3 months( he's now been my boyfriend for almost 3 years)I got ready for work one morning and made sure i looked real cute cause i was going to be seeing him after work. i made sure everything matched down to my jewelry. I lost an earring back at work that day and didn't want to not wear them cause they matched my outfit so i grabbed a pencil..bit off the eraser and stuck it on. I met up with him afterwork..went out to eat..watched a movie..and then went back to his place. Things got hot and we ended up in the bedroom. We we're having sex for the first time.The sex was so passionate and wild... we'd been going at it for about 15 minutes and going at it hard/fast ..when all of a sudden i felt something tickling my ear...i kept patting my ear and itching it and he was looking at me so funny (he was on top)...i kept hitting my ear and i tried to ignore it cause i was losing focus on the "act"...and finally my ear started to feel really uncomfortable inside and so i finally said "stop..i feel like somethings in my ear" ..he looked at me with this look like "are you serious i'm about to blow" and he kept going for a minute..i finally pushed him off me and said I'm serious something is in my ear. He jumped up and turned on the light and i look next to me on the bed and I see my earring. I run into the bathroom and i realize i can't see inside my ear...so i asked him to come in there and look for me. I jump on the bathroom counter (butt naked) and he grabs a flash light and starts looking in my ear (he's ALSO butt naked).. he's looking at it and he finally took a step back and looked at me funny..he looked in my other ear..looked back in the one that hurt again..and said "theres definitely something in your ear..but i don't know what it is?" i ran back over to the bed searching for my earring and the back..when it dawned on me..i had the earring...but the eraser is missing. I looked at him..told him what i had done at work with the earring and losing the back..he looked back inside my ear again with the flash light and BUSTED out laughing his ass off...! He told me that the eraser was for sure stuck inside my ear! I was freaking out and completely mortified. So here I am sitting butt ass naked on the sink...with this guy i really like standing there naked with a flashlight and a pair of tweezers..trying dig this eraser out of my ear. He attempted to get it out for 45 minutes (the whole time laughing so hard) until finally he said.."we need to take you to the ER". I just wanetd to die. It was 3:30am at this point and i did NOT want to go to the ER for this, but i had no choice. We throw our clothes on and he drives me to the ER. The whole way there I have my head tilted to the side (cause in my mind i thought if i had my head up straight the eraser would fall in deeper) and he is laughing his ass off. We get to the ER and i go to the triage nurse to sign in and she asks me.. "Do you need to see a doctor?" I knodded my head ..she asked me "What is your illness..or why are you here?" I look at my boyfriend and he again..wasn't able to help himself and starts laughing histerically...i tell the nurse "I have an eraser stuck in my ear" and she looked at me with the funniest look and handed me a pen and the clipboard with the papers i needed to fill out. I get to the section of "Reason for your visit" and put "Eraser stuck in left Ear" and wrote "Please don't ask" next to it. lol. 10 minutes later a nurse comes and calls my name and i walk up with my boyfriend and she immediately starts making jokes "Well..i hope you don't have a test tomorrow morning" she said (meaning i'd need my eraser for it) and proceeded to tell me how in her 30 years of being a nurse..she's seen little children and toddlers with things lodged in their ears and noses..but never a 18 year old. I get back in the room and the doctor comes in with a new nurse and he couldnt help but make jokes of his own... i proceeded to tell them the story about the earring at work and what i did..but i told them i was "sleeping" and i woke up with pain in my ear and the eraser must've fell in while i was sleeping (the whole time my boyfriend has a huge grin on his face). The doctor removed the eraser in 10 seconds and he looked at the eraser after he removed it..busted out laughing and handed it to me and asked me if i wanted to keep it. The nurse, the doctor and my boyfriend were laughing so hard talking about how they've never seen an 18 year old with something lodged in the ear and they thought it was the funniest thing they've heard of..I just at there awkwardly and finally jumped up..chucked the eraser in the trash can..thanked the doctor for removing the eraser(which hurt like a bitch by the way) and walked out of the room. My boyfriend ran out after me and told me it was okay..things happened and not to be upset. I wasn't upset...i was completely MORTIFIED lol. By the next day...all of his guy friends knew..and to this day him and his friends make fun of me for it. Sooo embarressing.

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