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by : zaff | written on :23/06/2009 | permalink

stupid!

I've been dumped

i was 16 when i know him and that was the first time i ever love someone.we've been messaging thru phones and email.we had only seen twice since he live far in another state.we don't really date actually cause at that time i was preparing for my examination so i ask him to wait for me until the exam is over,which is 8 month later.he said yes.he repeatedly tell me that he love me and will wait for me and thats it.i never seem to respond him quite well.whenever he told me that, i would just smile and say nothing.

feeling so happy of being love,i had never thought that he would see someone else.the exam days are coming and i spent most of my time studying rather than msging him like before.even if i had time for him,i've always spoil it!i've been talking to him roughly since i know that he had a new friend,a girl.we fight every single day.yes,they were just friend but i felt...jealous.we fight and i started to ask for breakup!argh,how stupid i was!!!he ask me if i ever love him even for once,n i said I NEVER!EVER!well,i dont really mean it.i was so angry at the time.he hang the phone and never send me any sms or calls.i've been dump!and that happen during my exam days.yes,my result are terribly affected!then after 4 years,i managed to contact him thru internet messenger.we chat as if nothing had happen.i never know if hE IS single or still dating with his girl friend which he done after he dumped me.it was four years later but he seem to remember a lot of things about me;my fave food,anime,birtdate,and even problems i share with him when we are together.he remember every details of it!but now i date someone else and that guy had never knew about me contact him,the one who dumped me.i somehow think that i still love him but i don't wanna hurt my BF.ouch!how stupid i am to never tell my first love that i love him!and now,i really felt the loss..even we had always messaging,he seems to take me as someone he once knew,not someone he once loved...and now im crying inside thinking how stupid i am to let anger possessed me and say something i dont mean to.how stupid i am to just let him go..hey gurls outside there,if you really love someone and he seems to feel the same,just tell him that you loved him and how nuch you appreciate hi..

you never know when he would walk away..

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Comments:
2009/06/25 12:28 - crashed writes:
i feel so sad for u. But thanks a lot for sharing with us.


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