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by : DayDreams | written on :01/04/2012 | permalink

My experience with dating a celeb soccerplayer.

I've never been so embarrassed

I met him at this event 'The Golden Shoe' in my hometown. I was lucky to get invited by someone I knew from a long time ago, because this was a invitation-only event, so you couldn't buy tickets to enter. I was quite nervous because I wasn't a real football-fan and didn't really know much about it neither. He was in the top 3 for winning the Golden Shoe, this is a trophy for football-player of the year in Europe, but every country has it's own. After the ceremony you could walk around and greet people and take pictures. I noticed him and a friend of mine took our picture together. The day after, I showed my pictures to the guys in my class and they all yelled that he was one of the most famous and loved goalkeepers in europe and that he now plays in madrid and why I didn't ask his number or anything. When I got home that day I added him on Facebook. I thought he didn't even manage his own account but he did and we started talking and everything clicked so well between us. Everything he said and texted was perfect, he really seemed honest and interested in me. He told me that often too. We couldn't meet because he lived in Spain now and I still live in Belgium but we talked everyday and texted constantly. I absolutely fell in love with the idea of us becoming a couple. And honestly, I already started imagining the "Victory Beckham Lifestyle" as well. But I really like(d) him. Not just for the great amount of money that he earns, but for the person that he claimed to be. Even when I was out for drinks with the girls and some random bloke started hitting on me, hot or not, I wouldn't give them the time of day because Thibaut was all I could think of. But still, sometimes it took him days to reply to my texts and I was always the one to start conversations, and on random occasions he'd just stop answering me in the middle of a conversation. I never mentioned any of this to him because I don't want to seem like a whining irritating person and I want him to feel free and comfortable when talking to me, but it does bother me a lot. Then, when out one night, a guy I was talking to and quite liked before I met Thibaut, came up to me and started talking. I came to find that the attraction I felt towards him had faded away completely, and finally I was certain that Thibaut was the one I wanted to be with. Texting him, the conversations, the butterflies when talking/thinking about him, this was it. I wanted him and I was going to tell him. He had already invited me to Madrid, a couple of times before but I was always doubting, now I texted him that a vacation was coming up and it was also my birthday and I suggested that we could spend it together. As I waited for a reply the days just kept coming and going. 3days later in class I asked someone else to text him to see if he get a reply. Nothing. But then one hour later my best friend called me to ask if I was okay. I had no idea what she was talking about, at all. She told me that Thibaut was all over the newspapers, he and Miss Limburg (that's a titel from a teen pageant over here) had started a relationship. It felt like a bomb exploded on me. I went blind from rage, ran out of class all the way to my best friend's house, red the article and started crying my eyes out. After that I just felt numb, numb and humiliated. I sent him a text on Facebook asking him why he didn't just tell me this instead of ignoring me, and I wished him the best. I didn't even get a reply. Then 3 weeks later my birthday arrived, the whole day I was in a good mood and I decided to check my Facebookaccount. To my surprise I had a message from him. I didn't open it, and the preview-sentence said; "Hey, I'm sorry about all what has happened but it all... " As I red this sentence I started to feel dizzy and decided to read the rest tomorrow so that it wouldn't ruin my birthday if he mailed me something like; "I'm sorry but we are in love"... First thing I did when I came home from my birthdayparty was open my Macbook and red his message. He said that he missed me and was sorry but it all happened so quick. I was happy and angry at the same time reading this. It all happened so quick but he couldn't even find a split second to tell me he started seeing someone else ?! I had to read it in the newspapers ?! And he missed me... what was I supposed to do with that information anyways ? I didn't write him back straightaway. But I did feel relieved I wasn't just one of the girls a football-player keeps himself occupied with until he finds his 'wag', and then forgets all about you. When I finally mailed him back, I wrote that it didn't matter it was in the past now, and that I missed our conversations too, because, okay I was still pissed, but the way he talked to me, it wasn't like all of those other guys. Maybe it had something to do with him being rich and quite famous . Because for him this meant, 100 girls standing in line and I was just one of them. But to me it meant that I was one of the hundred girls standing in line, but from all of those hundred girls he texted, mailed, and missed me. I wasn't sure if he was texting the same thing to the other 99 girls but I didn't want to believe so. After a while things started to look up for me. I got my modellingcontract and I was finally happy again. I decided to mail him one last time to thank him, because of this whole drama I pursued my modellingcareer again and it felt great. I got an instant reply, and so we started talking again. He told me how he felt his choices had been mistakes and his relationship wasn't going well at all. This sure brought a smile to my face. But this made me ask myself. Do you really want to start fighting for this guy again. This guy who was too lame before, to see what was standing in front of him. Or should I just walk away with my pride and forget him. The thought of me trying to forget him, and that talking months or probably years because I had to read about him in the newspapers every week, and here about him from his fans in my class, almost drove me crazy, not to mention that he could easily forget about me in 3days time. So I decided to take a leap of faith and give him another chance. One he didn't really seem to be asking or expecting, but still. We texted again and talked about everything and nothing, the only subject I avoided was his girlfriend and the way he treated me before. I tried to come over as someone who loves life, never has a bad day and never get's hurt. Which is for the first part very true. Then two weeks ago we started talking about me going to Madrid again. I still really really want to go, because I feel like it is the only chance I have of winning him over. Later that week he told me he had dumped his girlfriend. I asked him why, and told him I thought it was going to be because it was a "media-relationship" or because she seemed rather childish and a brat. He said that is was because he simply did not love her enough. It made me think about how I could make him fall in love with me. And why I wanted that so bad. I have enough guys I can choose from. Descent, loving and honest guys. They have success and are mature and handsome. Why did I want him from all the guys I could choose from ?! Is thing my everlasting curse ? Always wanting the one thing I can't have ? Always pursuing the unpursuable. Or did I want him because it would make me feel special, knowing that someone like him would choose someone 'ordinairy' like me. That I would in my own way be special enough, just for who I am and not what I do, to be with him. Because other girls all across the nation would envy me ? All I know is that I really and honestly like him a lot. I have become fond of him and I hate myself for it, but I think I have already fallen in love with the idea of him and me, being together. While I haven't told him this because I don't want to sound cheesy or scare him off, I feel miserable. This is totally not me. I'm not that "lovey dovey" type of girl. I'm ruthless when it comes to love. I'd rather deny the whole existence of it, that go through the whole drama of it all. Now we are texting regularly and talking on Facebook, he told me he is attracted to me, and wants me to come to Madrid. He emphasized that he feels a sexual attraction but that is not the only reason he wants me there. Yet, the only time I seem to draw his attention is when I seduce him with my female sexuality. He doesn't always text me back, leaves in the middle of a conversation, without any warning. Never starts a conversation and doesn't give me a date for when he wants me to come visit him. It drives me crazy, and it makes me feel used, naive and un appreciated. It makes me feel like I'm not in controle, a feeling I can't stand, but yet the one feeling that attracts me to him.

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Comments:
2012/04/28 14:25 - AppleBottomJeans writes:
Interesting
2012/04/29 06:36 - AppleBottomJeans writes:
Even though I have nothing to do with soccer or foot ball what ever you want to call it, I must admit that that is interesting.
2012/11/19 01:54 - smugledbrandy writes:
whoa alot of words here


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