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by : Anonymous | written on :30/05/2012 | permalink

Venting for the first time.

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I am the kind of person who does not like to talk to people about my problems. I am usually the one who gives advice to my friends/family about their problems. I am the voice of reason when it comes to them, but when it comes to my problems, I feel as though I overlook every little detail; things of the past fill my head and it really just pisses me off. I can not stop thinking about this incident that happened when I was a Junior in high school. It's been three years, but I always check my Ex-Bestfriend's social media outlets (Facebook, Twitter, etc.)I usually look at them, because I find amusement in her drastic change of life/personality. It is as though what happened between us turned her into an unrecognizable being. I could compare her change in personality like turning up the volume to MAX on a stereo system; it's her but just a highly obnoxiousness, highly narcissistic, highly delusional her. She is everything she said she wouldn't be. She was not like this at all when I met her, but I did meet her when we were in the 8th grade together, so time did pass and people do change over time. (I like to think I've stayed fairly the same) I guess I just got tired of our friendship. I really did not see a future with her in it to be honest, but I find myself thinking about her. Our friendship ended, but it was at the fault of both of us. I really do not care what people said about me during that time; mostly everyone sided with her, because she was a supposed "victim". People did not know my side of the story, and while she was spreading lies about me, I tried to find the good in her that once was there. A problem we both have is that we are too proud...filled with too much pride. Had Poor communication.& our Selfishness. I think how different my life is today, because of this incident. I kept my side of the story in the dark for over a year, and broke down when I revealed my side to a close friend, who also knew her and our situation. That was the only time I showed any emotion about the situation. I did not tell anyone anything for a year. I cried for myself and not for her. The way she is now...she doesn't deserve my pity. Apparently, if I talked sooner people would have understood my POV, but everyone who butted into our business were from her group of friends, so my say wouldn't have mattered anyway. This incident just really opened me up to what kind of person she is, and I am glad she is no longer in my life, but I feel that this incident is to blame for her change in personality (like a defense mechanism that just stuck). But with the situation that happened, I feel that our friendship was doomed to fail. I thought she was different and could understand, but I was wrong and now I'm left here ranting for the millionth time about this self-absorbed bitch. I'm sure this won't be the last time I mention her.

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Comments:
2012/08/26 11:34 - rvhackit writes:
Dont think she is like that...
I can say its ur fault, bcoz u R THE ONE WHO DONT WANT TO SHARE YOUR PROBLEM...

Try to understand your self, IS REALLY U R THE PERSON WHO DONT WANT SHARE PROBLEMS, or u feels, what the person will think if say u r in problem???


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